Fighting the Darkness
Practical Commentary on Fear Through Fiction
Analysis of Fighting the Darkness
(Photo by Josh Willink: https://www.pexels.com/photo/family-doing-stargazing-8364938/)
For our next adventure - I’m going to give you writer lessons in how to create the healing you’re working on through writing. But last week I wanted to demonstrate by example how story can be healing. This week is the analysis of that.
So… I’m bringing back my fan fiction dad and daughter archaeologist duo, Indiana Jones and his daughter, Emily. You met them in ‘It Wasn’t Fun - But You Won’ earlier in the monomyth.
‘It Wasn’t Fun - But You Won’ was a scene where as an adult Emily had a panic attack and flashback to when she was a child and gotten trapped in a tomb. It’s focus and theme of sorts was facing your childhood fears with empathy.
Fighting the Darkness is a scene in the aftermath of Emily’s childhood incident. She’s four and they’re in an ancient city in Israel. It’s been a few weeks since the tomb cave in incident and Emily hasn’t been sleeping well. I recently wrote it to attempt to deal with some of the feelings I had the in aftermath of a car accident that occurred when I was four.
Different scene. Different setting. Different characters. There’s nothing about me in this, yet I wrote it to sort out my emotions and give myself the healing that I needed.
In ‘It Wasn’t Fun - But You Won’ the focus was on empathy. This time I want to concentrate on how grown ups see the world and how children see the world. The hopeful takeaway is that you’ll have an example of how grown up you can take care of child you.
Fighting the Darkness Analysis
Israel, 1947
Indy felt a small hand stabbing his ribs as he tried to sleep. “Yes, Em?” He murmured exhausted.
“Can’t sleep.”
Indy moved his arm out of the bedroll. “Want to sleep on my shoulder?”
(Human touch is part of human connection. One person’s nervous system can calm down another person’s nervous system. That’s why physical and sexual abuse are so horrifying. They take what’s meant to be safe and comforting to our human nervous system and make the comfort we need unsafe. This is a biological response based on experience. However, some damage can be reversed with consistent safety and trusting relationships.)
“No.”
“Em… please…”
“Daddy, please…”
Indy sat up. He’d heard the fear in her voice. “What is it, Littlest Artifact?”
(He’s responding to the fear in her voice with empathy. We need to respond to our fears as grown ups and to our inner children… even if these fears sound dumb or we don’t know what they are yet. Its part of the healing process. Responses in empathy instead of judgement are vital. Remember, the grown up you is going to take care of the needs that the child you didn’t get.)
“I’m scared to sleep.”
Indy took a quiet breath, staring at his daughter.
(Again, breathing is regulation of emotions. Notice, he’s not upset at her for telling him this. There’s no yelling, or telling her that her fears are dumb, stupid and childish. She’s scared. He’s present and calm, gently reminding her that she’s capable, and trying to understand.)
“You were sleeping just fine on my chest this afternoon while I was grading papers…”
“It wasn’t dark out.” She was hesitant then spoke again. “I don’t like it when the world gets all dark like the tomb.”
(She tells him what’s wrong. It makes no sense in grown up mind, because grown ups know that the sun will rise every morning.)
Indy flopped against his rolled up jacket, which he’d been using as pillow. “Em…”
(Sometimes we run out of empathy because we’re exhausted… and sometimes we need that exhaustion to bring our fears to the surface.)
“But you told me sleeping was bad!” Emily protested.
(When we’re children what the adults say is always true, and in this case she is trying to obey what was said, along with a mix of real fears and big trauma from the tomb cave in. Trauma puts us into overwhelm and that always makes life confusing. Things like this can also put us into conflict with ourselves as adults… because as grown ups there are things we’re capable of doing and need to do, but these things which must be done upset our inner child.)
“When?” her father asked, not remembering.
(Adults in crisis mode don’t remember half of what they do in a crisis… which is highly unhelpful in situations like this, and that’s why we as adults need to train ourselves to stay calm and grounded in tense situations. We’re not going to do it right 100% of the time, but the more we do to train our systems to stay calm, the more present and calming we’ll be for the people who need us. And for when we need to practice this in ourselves.)
“When I woke up on the camel and we were running away.”
Indy wrapped his jacket around Emily. She was still small enough to be swallowed in it.
(For some people having weight like a pillow or a blanket, or in this case a leather jacket, is calming. It has something to do with our human biology that has a need to be held and comforted.)
“Em,” he brushed her face with his hand, trying to avoid the bandages. “When people fall asleep and they have head injuries it’s not a nap - it’s called a coma. You’re getting better sweetheart. It’s safe for you to take naps.”
(This is an age appropriate explanation for what has happened to her and why it was unsafe for her to fall asleep. The follow up is that she’s getting better and she’s safe. Both of these things are critical to hear, no matter what age you’re dealing with. But this only works if there’s a trusting relationship… which is why responding to your inner child in anger when they have emotions that you as the grown up have to deal with, accomplishes nothing, and may even deepen the wounds.)
“Even when it’s dark out?”
“Especially when it’s dark out,” Indy tried not to groan through his exhaustion. “So go to sleep.” He put his fedora hat over his face, hoping Emily would take the hint and settle. His arm was still out, waiting for her to lunge and snuggle like she’d been doing the past several days.
(Despite his tiredness, he hasn’t gotten angry or withdrawn an offer for age appropriate comfort and affection. Grown up you might have different emotions than child you. But you are the same person, just at different mental ages, so you need to work together to accomplish healing. And often that means grown up you has to hug child you.)
She didn’t move. “Didn’t the ancient Egyptians think that their gods fought when the sun goes down?”
(*Yes, this is the ancient mythology of the Egyptians. - Author Note*)
“Yes.” Indy blinked behind his fedora, uneasy to start another conversation.
“And if the right god didn’t win… the sun wouldn’t come back up?” Her tiny voice was trembling.
(She’s scared of the mythology of the ancient Egyptians, because it may mean that she’s stuck in the dark… and she’s got trauma around a dark and scary place. Welcome to child logic. And we as adults go back there when we’re scared and overwhelmed, no matter how old we are. To logical adult mind, this makes no sense - but we still have to deal with it, because child us is scared. And we can’t heal when we’re not safe.)
“Yes. That’s what they believed.”
“Do I need to do something to make sure the sun rises?”
(This is the child putting the blame of the incident they couldn’t control on themselves. They don’t have the capacity to sort out the situation… so they often through kid logic, turn the situation in on themselves. She thinks she has to do something to make the bad thing right and stop being afraid… when she really isn’t at fault at all.)
Indy turned on his side and lifted his fedora. “Em… what’s wrong?”
(Again, we have response and eye contact… which can sometimes reveal intent through facial expressions. Even babies need to see faces. And there’s the question we all need to ask our child selves… ‘What’s wrong?’ We may not always have the answer for it, but sometimes just having the question asked, and leaving room for the answer, will bring healing.)
“I don’t like it when the world feels like a tomb!” She crawled against Indy’s chest, crying.
(And because he hasn’t gotten angry at her, she feels safe enough to ask for physical comfort. This is also her dad. Parents are supposed to be the steady rocks in their children’s lives. This is isn’t always true, but kids need their parents to teach them how to emotionally regulate. And we as adults can do this for ourselves as we learn to heal.)
“Come Littlest Artifact,” Indy mused, fully awake. “I’m going to teach you something. Let’s go up on the roof and look at the stars.”
(He tells he that she’s going to be taught and what they’re going to do, so she’s prepared and doesn’t get more scared. The unknown is always frightening, no matter what physical age or mental age you are. This is also done through movement and action. Movement and action as well as being told what is coming, can sometimes be helpful to regulate the body from being very scared or excited, back into a calm state.)
“Don’t wanna be outside. Scary. Dark.”
“It’s darker in here than outside,” Indy replied.
(*Again, you can see the awkward dynamic between grown up logic and child logic. He’s looking around the room seeing darkness and presuming that dark is dark. To Em, dark is terrifying, so there’s an emotion that goes with it. Em will have to deal with the emotion. To her dad, there’s no emotion, because grown up logic knows that night ends. He has to realize these things, see the world from his daughter’s point of view and recognize her fear… then attempt to solve it or gently control it, working with her to empower her to get through her fear. This is what we all need to do when we encounter a hurt, scared or needy child version of ourselves. It helps with others outside ourselves as well.)
“Hang on.” He pulled a cigarette lighter out of his left jacket pocket. “Em, you’ve seen me start fires with this… if you get scared, we have a light. Ok?”
(This is one of my favorite moments. He’s giving her a tool so she doesn’t have to be afraid. Granted its a cigarette lighter and most people wouldn’t want their five year old playing with an open flame, but this is an era where cigarettes were common. And she knows how to use it because she’s seen her dad start campfires with it when they’re out adventuring. So she gets a tool - to help her against her fears. And she’s put in charge of it. He’s empowering her to do something against her fears. She’s in charge of one piece. There’s suddenly something she can do against all the big scary things in her world.)
“Ok.” She stared at it, as Indy let her hold the cigarette lighter.
Indy offered Em his hand. She took it, wrapping herself around his hand and forearm, her other hand clutching the cigarette lighter.
(*This is where body language comes in. Its not just a hand hold, she’s truly scared and has wrapped herself around her father’s entire forearm. He could have pulled away, but he’s not. He’s there for his scared little girl - without judgement, because to grown ups, this fear of the dark is kind of silly. For her, this means that there’s someone strong, who she can trust to protect her… which is what good parents should be doing. And if we want to heal, we need to be a good parent to our inner child selves.)
Indy climbed the stairs of the city’s outer wall and motioned Em to sit down with him. She plunked in his lap, leaning against his chest. Indy put his arms around her.
(*Again, this is physical comfort and compression, which has biological links to our safety.)
“Look up, hon… see all those stars?”
“Wow.”
“There’s a lot of them, right Em?”
“Yeah.”
“Why don’t you try counting them?”
She turned back to look at Indy. “Is this a plot to make me fall asleep?”
Indy grinned. “You’re adorable. But I know you better than that. You wouldn’t fall for that.”
(This is reassurance. She needs to know that things are going to be ok. He’s providing that moment, and making certain that she has a secure emotional attachment. As a child, she’s being complimented on being loved and smart. Kids need to hear things like this. They also need to know its safe to ask questions. This is a trust question and he gives her an answer that makes her feel more secure.)
Em went back to staring at the stars. Indy leaned over her shoulder, explaining at a whisper. “While the Egyptian gods were supposed to be fighting over the sunrise… there was a man named Abram who got a visitor. And that visitor told him he was going to have a bigger family then there were stars. But Abram didn’t have any kids… and his wife thought the visitor was crazy. But Abram had kids, eventually. And they live in this land right now. And some live all around the world. And a lot of those descendants think that Abram’s visitor was God, who created the stars. And as the creator - he’s in charge of making the sun shine and the moon come out. He knows every star out there and they all have names.”
“Does he know where Mom and Annie are?”
Indy’s voice caught. “I’m sure he does.”
“Did you ever meet him?”
Indy thought back over his adventures. “No, but I know that the artifacts that claim to be his have more power and feeling to them than other things.”
Emily paused for a moment, thinking. “Then I guess I should talk to him about my fear of the dark… since he’s in charge of making it not dark.”
“I think he’d understand,” Indy replied softly. “You see… some people say he got stuck in a tomb, too.”
(This is a form of empathy… helping someone realize that another person has been through the same chaos and survived. You can look back on it say, “I got through the scary thing. And I as grown up will be with child me to also get through the scary thing.” Then you can take your inner child’s hand and say, “C’mon. I know the way out, because I’ve been here before. I should have been here for you. I’m sorry I’m late - but I’m here now. Let’s walk out together.”)
“How’d he get out?” Emily asked.
Indy shrugged. “From what I heard there was a big rock… and he just rolled it out of the way.”
Their continuing adventures are on my Wattpad page.
Perpetual Disclaimer for this series:
I am not a counselor or a mental health professional. I am going to attempt to avoid things which will cause alarm or harm, but I can't know what will trigger each individual. If you need to speak to a mental health professional please know that there are resources available.
Your stories are amazing!
Chronic Writer